Peace Corps undoubtably has a think tank of PR consultants whose sole purpose is to selectively brand the frustrations and loneliness of two years abroad as one grand "opportunity for personal growth," offering "memories to last a lifetime." For the most part I think they're doing a good job. I'm here, aren't I? Something must have lured me to apply.
The truth is it's easy to forget why I even applied in the first place. It rains all day here, the language is difficult to learn, and my host mom is suffocatingly worrisome. There are countless rules and regulations and reasons to break down crying. I miss my old life. I miss hot showers. I miss sitting on a sofa, or really any surface not made of cheap white plastic. I want to eat pork chops and mac'n'cheese. I want to feel normal, accepted, understood.
I don't think I'll ever be able to really capture what it's like to be here. The emotional roller coaster changes direction too fast for my stories to keep up. Most of the time I just end up crying. (Remember what I told you about the toilets?)
But for all the stupid reasons I turn on the waterworks, Monday definitely takes the cake.
Monday was a big, big day. Carrie Hessler-Radelet, Acting Director of Peace Corps, was visiting El Salvador for the regional director's conference. If you didn't know, Carrie is a big deal. She is the head of all things Peace Corps. It's not uncommon for her to meet with foreign presidents. In fact she has a great story about an African president whose life was deeply effected by a PCV. Carrie is also quite possibly the most inspiring person I've ever met in my entire life.
All day the pressure was mounting for Kai, Maria and me because Carrie and her entourage of top ranking Peace Corps officials were scheduled to arrive at our humble training center during our session on teamwork. I was surprised when she volunteered to participate in a skit about a malfunctioning ADESCO. She played the part of a disgruntled president very well!
Carrie and PCTs (smiling because this is the part of the skit where the PCVs save the day!)
PCTs and Carlos Torres, Global Operations Director, acting in a skit about a chaotic youth group. He was hilarious!
After our presentation (which of course we rocked), Carrie and Carlos asked us some questions about the application process. Oh Carrie, don't you know that Peace Corps has the most difficult application in the world? I'm convinced it's easier to get a visa to North Korea than apply for the Peace Corps.
And so we unloaded. My personal application process had its own frustrations, but I just figured it was PC's way of weeding out the "I'm gonna change the world!" types. Everyone seemed to have a problem: lack of communication, no clear direction, lost files, bureaucratic red tape, ridiculous medical costs.
Carrie listened to all of our complaints with grace, and then she let us in on some of the changes Peace Corps is making. Let me tell you, this is not your mother's Peace Corps administration. The application will be unrecognizable by the time they're done, and the changes are amazing.
When I applied the 'general mentality' was that preferences signaled inflexibility. Inflexible people are not invited to serve. It's simple as that. If you were offered youth development in the Dominican Republic, but you dislike the Caribbean and children, you better shut up and take it because your Placement Officer told you to. And then when you resign your fate and accept the invitation, there's always the possibility that one week before you leave you get pulled for some benign question you entrusted to PC Washington's medical staff.
(This is a completely true story for my dear friend who applied at the same time as me but is now waiting for another invitation, possibly in January 2014. Of all people I know, he would make an excellent volunteer and I really think PC dropped the ball with him.)
Carrie told us of an application process that is so much more evolved, it makes everything that came before seem archaic. I'm not sure how much I can divulge, but I can say that I wish I could apply again.
PC Washington often gets a bad rap. They're closed minded, bureaucratic a-holes with a 3 year turnover rate. But this is changing under Carrie's leadership. She cares about us, the Peace Corps Volunteers. She's overhauling the entire Peace Corps 'general mentality'. It's new. It's improved. It's what this organization was destined to embody.
This is about when I started to cry. You see, I suddenly remembered why I applied over a year ago. The answer is really as simple as this: I want to be a Peace Corps Volunteer. I want to be a member of this great organization, and I want to tell everyone I meet about the two crazy years I served with the Peace Corps. There's a special sort of pride that comes with closing your service. There's an elite club that only RPCVs can be a part of. I want that and I'm here, weeks away from swearing in. Every day I'm making my dream come true.
At this point I'm sobbing. I can no longer sniffle in the corner unnoticed. Carrie, being the significantly wonderful person she is, does not run away when I choke out a few words of thanks. I really do want to thank her for helping me remember why I wake up after the really bad days and stay. She helped give life to the famous PC moto- this truly is the toughest job I'll ever love.
Geez, I look terrible! Carrie and me after I sobbed all over her. I can't believe this is the only photo I took!
SanAn! Yes, we color coordinated. Because we're awesome.
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