Got leche?

I've been trying to make an effort to better understand gender roles in El Salvador. When we get the funds for the art grant (fingers crossed), I'll start leading gender equality workshops with the kids. I know I can't insist on anything crazy- like that women should be allowed a casual Friday night drink with her gal pals or, worse, a male suitor- but I can pose some general questions regarding gender roles in this country and beyond.

I spend most of my day, whether consciously or not, evading the gender constrictions I'm expected to follow because though I am gringa, I am female, too. I wear pants despite my host mom's disappointment, and I actively avoid mopping the floor. I've stopped half-heartedly offering my help to bake bread at 5am and I really don't care if people describe me as "bien brava." 

I decided to start by spending more time with salvadoran women I admire and get a sense of what gender means to them. Now, approaching gender issues with a clipboard just ain't my style. I've honestly always wanted to learn how to make comida tipica, and what better way to get to know salvadoran woman than by cooking? (I really think Americans would love salvadoran food if they were exposed to it. Maybe someday I'll help get a real, honest pupusaria in Chicago.) Ciomara, the amazing woman who took on the responsibility of hosting two trainees for Immersion Days, is a great lady to chit chat with and an even better cook. She's the youngest of nine, traditional, spends most of her time in the home and always has a hot meal ready when her husband comes home. She also works hard to keep her daughter focused on college. I love Ciomara for her wit and I was so happy she agreed to show me how to make arroz con leche.

The process is pretty straightforward- put the rice and the milk together. But spending time with Cio was an education in itself. She prides herself on only cooking with all natural herbs and spices. You might think that our campo culture naturally cooks like this, but that's just not true. Most people go for the quick soup mix, soda, and a bag of chips for dinner. Cio credits her husband, the community's health promoter, for teaching her about clean eating. Her husband, I might add, is also pretty amazing. He's kind and fatherly towards everyone, and he's a big supporter of gender equality. He has no qualms sweeping up the house or boiling the beans at night. They're a great team.

I made a lot of interesting observations. Cio asked her husband about five times to taste the arroz con leche to see if it was sweet enough (it was) or if the rice was cooked enough (it was). He always pondered the latest spoonful carefully and gave his advice as if he was an old White House aide deliberating new legislation or war strategy. I think deep down Cio knows she makes delicious arroz con leche, but asking her husband's opinion is more important than her ego.

Cio, looking mildly disgusted as she skims some of the fat off the top.

Looks kinda weird, but it tastes really good!

So much orange. 

Ahhhhhhhh!

My new friend Susana, who turned 79 next month, ties some too.

As stubborn as I can be about gender expectations here, I did concede some femininity last week when Belky did my nails. It only took TWO HOURS hunched over on an uncomfortable wood bench. Next time, I think I'll pick the design. And by design I mean no design. My back still hurts!

But they do look good!